The Story

There is no story! It’s just like being at the finals of The Eurovision Song Contest!

Song Contest Almost Eurovision plays true to the real Eurovision finals. Countries compete and do whatever they can to win. It’s noisy, brash and exceedingly funny.

There’s a gushing host and at least one “questionable” contestant who’s likely had too many Schnapps (just to keep things realistic). 

It’s just as exciting as the real thing, the audience gets tribal and very vocal, but their hearts are always warm with big smiles on their dials. 

Be warned this is not a genteel Bunraku type of show. No falling asleep is possible.

You’ll be picked up, taken to level eleven, shaken a bit to get the blood pumping and laugh your head off. Specially-trained ushers will screw it back on.

Here’s how the show runs.

ACT 1.

Everyone in the audience gets a badge, a flag and a clacker. If you haven’t downloaded the app already, we will show you how to do so, how to use the clackers and flags, and give a guided demonstration of the Mexican Wave.

The show is set in Minsk, capital of Belarus. Our hostess, Bettina Pikmannoz, a local TV personality, former national pole-vaulting champion, lifestyle hostess and cabaret singer is determined to show the world that Belarus has what it takes to put on a world-class event. (Notwithstanding the modest budget and interference from the Kremlin.)

Eleven countries compete on the night. Seven of those countries are already selected: Norway, Hungary, Ireland, Germany, Greece, Ukraine and Italy. Co-creators will decide on the four remaining countries. Already got an idea? Let us know.

The competitors sing their guts out, doing all the weird things we have come to expect from Eurovision. There’ll be no shortage of laughs or eyebrows raised so high they stick to the ceiling.

After the final song, voting starts. The audience selects their top five countries (no you cannot vote for your own country. Sorry, rules are rules).  

During the interval, there’s time for a drinky, a chokky and a chat – and predictions of who will win.

ACT 2.

Act 2 opens with the mega half-time entertainment, “Come Alive in Belarus”, featuring the Song Contest choir and the entire cast. A mammoth jump out of the gates.

The voting tally begins. Bettina crosses “live” to each country to find out their votes. This is nail-biting and very funny stuff –  we never see a runaway winner (as sometimes happens with the real Eurovision).

After the final vote, the winner is revealed! Glitter confetti falls from the ceiling as the winning contestant performs their song once again to the audience’s delight.

Bows, the audience is enraptured and immediately blabbers on social media. Everybody goes home, happy and buzzing.

That’s the order. We cannot wait to see you there!